28 Mar 2012
Top Floor, Bottom Buzzer - Morphine
I discovered Morphine through my dad, of all people. Although at pretty much the exact same time Jessica also came across it too. To this day I’m a little fuzzy on the details, but what I know is that me, my dad, and Jessica were all grooving on this at the same time. My mom couldn’t stand it, but she was outnumbered.
The entry point was The Night, and at least for me the first song was “Top Floor, Bottom Buzzer”. It was the sort of song that really worked for my dad, a real foot tapper. I remember sitting at the dining table listening to it with him and Jessica.
It’s actually really striking how perfect an introduction this was for me. It’s not an entirely representative Morphine song, but it was the right one for the journey I had been on. The beat, the organ, the horns, the nonsense lyrics, a deep earthy bass-y feel. Looking back at my path, this song had so many elements that my receptors were perfectly tuned for, waiting. And once this song hooked me, I delved into Morphine deep.
But let me tell you, there are few things as tragic as finally finding your favorite band, and then realizing that the album you hold in your hand is a posthumous release. There will never be any more Morphine, and it kills me. Their music speaks to me in a visceral way, and there’s truly nothing else out there like it.
Souvenir - Morphine
“Souvenir” didn’t hit my radar right away. But hot damn how it worked its tendrils in. The creepy piano. Minimalistic sound. Crippled drum beat. A rumbling darkness. It evokes a dark smoky bar, silent after hours. Or a black swamp. I feel like I’m moving through molasses. And then the horns start to come in, gently at first, and then in full climax. Rolling, unearthing, drudging up… something. So. Hot.
Running to Stand Still - U2
This is an odd choice to place here in the timeline. Let me explain. This was the Napster era. For music discovery, it was a beautiful revelation. Thought could become experience within a matter of moments.
But it was also an opportunity for rediscovery. Songs, ideas that I had been exposed to in the past… I now had a tool with which go back and explore them. This happened with The Joshua Tree. I’m pretty sure my brother had the album while I was still at home, but he wasn’t about to let me hang on to it after I had so thoroughly stolen Rattle and Hum. It wasn’t until the Napster era that I went back and turned those initial glimpses into a real experience. That’s when I really found and fell in love with “Running to Stand Still.” And then I bought the album.
Debra - Beck
The magic of the internet also enabled discovery of new awesome things, including this song. I had heard some Beck back when he put out Odelay, and that sound didn’t really work for me. But this song. Is. Awesome.
It’s funny. It’s groovy. It’s sexy. It made me like Beck, and really see the dynamic and capable artist he is. It takes some serious skill to pull off something like this, and he’s got it in spades. I wouldn’t start processing Beck on album level until Sea Change, but it’s this song that laid the groundwork.
26 Mar 2012
Ever So Lonely - Sheila Chandra
I feel like I’ve been saying this a lot (and will continue to): this song is huddled inside, out of the cold and rain, in bed with Jessica. It sounds scandalous, but even though it’s none of your business I feel like I need to say I’m not implying any impropriety. We just spent a lot of time in bed, cuddled up, listening to music. Let’s be fair, we still do. But those first months were a huge injection of shared musical experiences. Some were new for just me, some were new for both. In this case it was an album from her roommate Erin, so we were processing it at the same time.
It’s noteworthy how not in-line with my style this is. It’s all vocals, and there’s not a lick of rhythm to most of it. It’s more ambience than what I’d usually consider music. But it’s also incredibly beautiful.
Years later, Jessica and I were probably the only two people in the movie theater who perked up to a song in The Two Towers to wonder “Is that Sheila Chandra?”
Almost Done - Morcheeba
I remember “Friction” off of Big Calm being the first Morcheeba song Jessica played for me. But it wasn’t the one that first connected. Naturally, it was the stuff we listened to while laying around: Who Can You Trust?
Apparently the whole time we were listening to it Jessica was a little on edge. I was listening to almost strictly acoustic music at the time. Every time a track had a little record scratch she was worried that I would freak out. I didn’t. I had never heard this whole “trip-hop” thing, but it totally worked for me. Relaxed, but rhythmic? Sign me up.
“Trigger Hippie” is the catchy song that welcomes you in. “Tape Loop” then firmly carries you into a relaxed groove. But the real destination of all of this, the place you hope to elevate to, is “Almost Done”.
I just want to breathe it in and live there. It’s slow enough to leave you eagerly anticipating every next movement. This song is just so damned sexy. It’s like the song is making love to my head.
Shoulder Holster - Morcheeba
After Who Can You Trust? won me over, it was time to delve into Big Calm. The tone of was considerably more up-beat, but still ever so good. Where the previous album was down and gritty, this one immediately lifted me up with the crystal vocals of “The Sea”.
But the song that stood out for me was “Shoulder Holster”. And I couldn’t immediately put my finger on why. It was this crazy blend of all sorts of musical influences, and it totally worked in this way unlike anything I’d ever heard. Deep vocals, a heavy beat, sitar, record scratching, slide guitar… it all melded into some crazy kind of awesome.
Dishonorable mention to the title track, “Big Calm”. Pretty much every Morcheeba album had one truly awful song that never should have happened. How that became the title of the album is beyond me. Skip it, enjoy the rest.
Criminal - Fiona Apple
I had heard Fiona Apple before. I remembered seeing the video for this song on the MTVs, with her all vignetted, emaciated, and red eyed. I also remember her legendary acceptance speech. For as much as the music industry tried to treat her as some weird heroine-chic sex object, there is some serious power in that small frame. Her voice, her piano… so deep.
So I first heard this back in ‘96. I almost ended up with the album too. There was one of those CD club things where you could get a couple albums cheap if you then remembered to get out again quick. This album was barely cut from my first draft list, and I didn’t end up getting it.
Which brings us to this time with Jessica, who was smarter than me and had picked up the album. It’s basically impossible to pick a single song to represent it; the album is just too good. And it matched the chill mood that Jessica and I had together. I finally got to my chance to sink into the deep rolling tones of Tidal, and it was so good.
23 Mar 2012
Say Goodbye - Dave Matthews Band
I told you Crash was going to show up a lot on this list. This one’s special though, trust me.
I’m in my dorm room, and it’s raining outside. With me is my new friend Jessica, and we just had an unexpected and delightful make-out session. The sound of the rain… I can still hear it in the song. I swear it’s part of the track.
In that blissful moment we are listening to this song and drinking the lyrical kool-aid. “Tonight let’s be lovers… and tomorrow go back to being friends.” I mean, this diversion was fun and all, but long-term it’s a terrible idea. So we should just stick with the original plan and be friends. This is totally going to work. No problem.
Yeah.
Spoiler: I married her. Not right then and there, god no. We were so young! Years later. The point is, I can’t hear this song without thinking about the beginning of it all. The moment when we first really saw each other and what could be.
Perfect Blue Buildings - Counting Crows
Jessica and I didn’t go to the same school. We weren’t so far away as to make crossing the distance impossible, but we only got to see each other on the occasional weekend. The difficulty was compounded by the fact that I didn’t have a car, so mostly she had to come to me. But there were definitely times when I could make it out to her. And those times are deeply ingrained into me.
Jessica had painted her dorm room blue. This most definitely wasn’t allowed by the school, but that didn’t stop her. It was this beautiful soothing deep blue, with a print of Starry Night on the wall. It was sanctuary.
We spent a lot of time in that room together. Laying around, talking, and listening to music. This entire Counting Crows album is a big part of that. It’s hard to pick out a single song to represent it. In the end I went with “Perfect Blue Buildings”, in memory of her perfect blue room.
On & On - Erykah Badu
This song comes from those early times spent lounging about with Jessica. The Counting Crows weren’t exactly a stretch for my palate; Erykah Badu was. But damn, this album is good. And not just as a collection of tracks, but as an album. It’s got planned book ending with “Rimshot”, which leads you in and out of the sound of the album. It’s got songs in the progression that set up and then call back to each other. It was planned as a cohesive experience. And I love that.
Remember how not so long ago I was paying attention to lyrics? Yeah… don’t think for a moment that that stuck. I was about to select a different song for this album, until I was informed that I had been mis-hearing the lyrics for, um, a decade. I thought the lyric was “still in bed”, apparently it was “still livin’”. Completely changed the song for me. Oh well, I still had “Certainly” and “On & On” as alternates.
Heavy Things - Phish
It was time to ring in a new millennium. Most years I would let the new year drift in without much celebration, but this was a moment worthy of epic party. I ended up going to a show in Portland with Jessica, Kevin, and Billy. Somewhere in a box I have photos from this trip, taken on a commemorative disposable camera.
The headlining band was The String Cheese Incident. I had heard of them before, but never listened to them. They were another jam band in the style of the Dead or Phish. I’m sure their performance was perfectly fine, but there was so much else going on that it didn’t really leave an impression on me. I did pick up an album to check them out, and remember getting a kick out of their cover of “Take Five”.
After the New Year had come I remember seeing a bit on TV about the various celebrations around the world. Of course our little Portland dig wasn’t featured, but they did show a full song from the epic Phish concert. It was weird to see Peter Jennings introduce this band that I’d spent so much time with.
The song was “Heavy Things”, and in no way did I experience that song during my actual New Year’s Eve celebration, but after the fact it became the song I associate with the event.
Brunette - Keller Williams
There were many acts at the millennial New Year’s Eve show: musicians, jugglers, dancers. One single musician really captivated me. He would record little bits with his guitar and voice (mouth trumpet and all), and in real time layer them over each other. It started out simple, but over time created a full rich sound.
He was clearly a very talented guitarist and the act was fun to listen to, but the nature of this type of performance doesn’t really transition to an album recording. He did have albums, but they’re just so different from what he did that night. I think something that at least somewhat captures his one man band sound is “Brunette”. It doesn’t have the layering, but it’s sure a whole lot of sound for just one guitar.
21 Mar 2012
Baba Blues - Hanuman Trio
I was in Portland with Kevin for a show of this band I had been listening to called The Jazz Mandolin Project. I’d had a mediocre experience with opening bands before, but this one stole the show. The leader of the trio, Jarrad Kaplan, illuminated that difference between a drummer and a true percussionist. He was surrounded all sorts of things that made sound, and he worked each of them to his advantage. You can hear Jarrad in the background of this recording, vocalizing along with the guitar. Because he was so damned into the music that he couldn’t help it. Such an raw energy in that man.
This song has such a delicious slow groove. It has time to breathe before it opens up. And the tone of Paul Benoit’s guitar… tasty. I bought an album from the band on the spot. I walked away far more interested in this small local band than the band that had actually brought me to the show.
I tracked this Hanuman band down with the magic of the internet. I found some sample tracks of their music on their web site, which was the first time I’d seen such a reasonable discovery experience. Try before you buy… what? That may had been technology magic, but the purchase was decidedly low tech: I sent a check to a local Seattle mailing address and one of the dudes in the band sent me back a CD.
The album that I had purchased was actually a journey backward in band time, to a time when the band had a flautist. You know… with a flute.
I liked the album, but I was oddly self conscious about it. I remember having a conversation with this girl in the dorms, Amy, about whether other people would judge me for my music. Maybe it was being thrust into a completely new group of people. Maybe it was living so close to everyone without a ton of privacy. But for moment I doubted myself. I doubted my music. She was reassuring. I got over it.
I think the track I played for her was “Green Man”, the first track. But in cataloging this entry I was extremely tempted to skip the memory and use the slot to promote “Emry’s Vision”, on account of it being rad. Or “Moon Dog Funk”. Lots of great moments on that album.
One Sweet World - Dave Matthews & Tim Reynolds
I listened to a lot of Dave Matthews Band in high school, as you know by now. The same year I left for college Dave released this album from his acoustic college tours. He paired with Tim Reynolds, and the two of them worked without additional accompaniment to replicate the band’s full sound. The album thus centered on songs that can be played by two guitars. As I set off to meet new people, guitar in hand, this was perfect for me.
I have many memories of doing Dave Matthews covers with my friends Dan and Billy in the dorms. Some of the residents loved that; others wanted us to shut up so they could go back to studying. Regardless I think of this as my high point in guitar-dom. Good music, good friends, simple times. One of us would continue on to take music more seriously. Sadly, it wasn’t me; that honor goes to Dan.
My choice of “One Sweet World” here is pretty much arbitrary. It captures the feel of the album, but we pretty much played all of them and so much more.
Run On - Moby
Although we were in my acoustic golden age, that wasn’t all I was listening to. This song… this song is excellent. That driving piano beat, the sampled vocals with that olde thyme feel, the smooth tone, and relentless grove. This isn’t music performed by musicians on raw instruments. It’s remixed, blended… and somehow better for it. This album laid some groundwork for my acceptance of music to come.
19 Mar 2012
They Can’t Take That Away From Me - Diana Krall
Okay, I feel terribly exposed talking about all these intimate details on the internet. When I started this project I didn’t realize how personal it was going to get. I guess that’s just the cost of telling my musical story. My relationship to music is intimate and steeped in memory. I’m apparently incapable of talking about one without the other.
So, continuing…
It’s a unique kind of relationship that starts from an existing close friendship. There’s an immediate intensity to it. Combine that with a fixed time limit, and it’s even more so. In this song I clearly see the two of us, up late talking, listening to music, and just generally enjoying the moment. This memory must have taken time during high school, not the summer after, because I specifically remember hearing the lyric of “the way we dance ‘til 3” and realizing that it was at least 3am at that very moment. On a school night. And I had to be up in only a few hours. Still, no regrets.
For someone who isn’t really into lyrics, I seem rather focused on them here. But the song doesn’t lie, this was a person who really and truly changed my life. I would not be the same person if I had never met her. The memory of all that… no, you can’t take that way from me.
Like a Prayer - Madonna
There are two memories to go along with this song. The first is well before this moment in time, somewhere early 90’s.
It’s dinner time, but MTV is playing in the adjacent living room. For some reason it just gets left on. My dad wanders over to watch what’s going on over there. On MTV is Madonna, specifically “Like a Prayer”. He seems a little overly fixated, or at least according to my mom’s perception. Shortly thereafter a call is made to the cable company and we no longer have MTV.
This remains true until years later when they switch what channel MTV airs on and instead we’re blocked out of some other (far more harmless) channel. My brother and I neglect to inform my mom of the change.
Pulling the plug on MTV was for the best, really. By then it had already started its transition from music television to teenage marketing. I was glad to be exposed to music videos at all, because the pairing of music to imagery can be extremely powerful. But in the long run I was better off without MTV.
Okay, so given that story why am I talking about “Like a Prayer” now?
It’s Senior prom. Not my school’s prom, but that of a friend. A special friend who never really became a special friend. Look, it’s too complicated to get into here.
Despite not knowing anyone there because it wasn’t my school I still had a good time at the prom. When it’s over we head to an after-party at one of her friend’s house. Nothing rambunctious, just a small group of people hanging out, giggling, and signing karaoke.
It was at this point that my friend completely transformed my interpretation of this song. She explained to all of us that this song is about fellatio, right before singing it, and dancing along. I remember laughing, a lot. She was quite convincing, and now that’s all I hear from this song.
Weapon and the Wound - Days of the New
Okay, we need a shift in tone. Something a little less heavy. Well… this song has one of those odd associations that’s entirely personal to me and completely irrelevant to anyone else. This song makes me think of mammoth tanks.
I’m on the computer in my dad’s office. I’m listening to the radio and they’re doing an interview on the release of the second Days of the New album. It turns out the band is really just one dude, Travis Meeks, because he fired the rest between albums. The first album was basically acoustic guitar porn; the second one is a far more ambitious project.
The point is that I was listening to this interview and later the whole album as I’m playing Command & Conquer: Tiberian Sun. I’m building my base, sending out tanks, and listening to my custom soundtrack. Two independent pieces of content consumed at the same time, forever linked together in my brain.
I struggled to pick the one song from the album to represent this connection. In the end it had to be “Weapon and the Wound”, because I have a reaction to the orchestral beginning of this song that evokes specific units from the game. What I was doing and what I was listening to matched particularly poorly at that point in time. The song does not suggest mammoth tank carnage, but that’s what was unfolding before my eyes. Yet now, they totally match for me, because that’s how memory links everything together.
Probably more than any other, this song represents what this list is about. Music memory.
I had just dropped my girlfriend and her family off at the airport. I saw them off at the gate, because back then you could do that sort of thing. It’s shortly after that moment, and I’m driving their minivan home. But it’s my music in the stereo. This isn’t the first song that comes on after leaving the airport; it’s actually a bit later when this perfect match to my mood hits. To this day I can see where I was in all clarity, driving on I-5, every single time this song starts.
In that moment emotion and music found each other and fused. Permanently. Those first couple notes hit me so hard, and they still do. After that gentle start then the song develops this understated drive that perfectly synced with my very real and physical drive away from a difficult emotional moment. It then turns its somber character to be slightly more optimistic. I was in that moment considering my very near and very unsure future, and this tone was a great aid to me.
That first minute and a half of this song are so intensely familiar to me. It’s honestly startling the power it still has over me.
I’ve always considered myself to have a poor memory. This whole project has really helped solidify a different perspective on that. It isn’t that my memory is bad; it’s that it doesn’t store what I expect it to. I never have forgotten the memory of this song, but I didn’t realize how many similar connections I have buried in my head. This musical archaeology has helped me realize this, and I’m so happy that I decided to go on this crazy journey.